


Randall's Naughty NATs Adult Boutique

by MargaretKire



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Companion Piece to Scrubbing Bubbles, M/M, Sex Shop for Supernatural Creatures, Stiles is Catnip to Creatures of the Night
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-15
Updated: 2018-01-15
Packaged: 2019-03-05 08:12:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13383759
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MargaretKire/pseuds/MargaretKire
Summary: This is Stiles' dildo shopping scene fromScrubbing Bubbles. Could be read on its own... I think.Randall has gone just a bit too long without feeding. Of course, that's exactly when Stiles waltzes into his store looking for a werewolf dildo.





	Randall's Naughty NATs Adult Boutique

Randall was hungry. It was a dangerous game for a vampire. The thing was, blood just tasted _so_ much better when you allowed yourself to get really thirsty. Think, like, the difference between drinking a cold glass of water when you’re just trying to make your eight glasses a day, versus when you have been out in the broiling heat all day. Only make the glass of water a cold beer. Or whatever you love to drink most in the entire world. And then triple it. That doesn’t even come close to what it’s like to finally get a taste of blood when you’re a hungry vampire.

 

Fasting vampires risked making some poor decisions leading up to dinner, especially when, like Randall, the vampire owns a fine establishment like the Naughty NATs Adult Boutique. The name still made him smile. God, he was a genius.

 

His issue right now, though, was that all of his customers smelled edible, and technically, they all were. He watched the couple in aisle three rifling through the flavored lubes and giggling, the woman’s plump breasts and tummy bouncing, and Randall caught himself literally salivating with want, his fangs lengthening and pricking into his lower lip.

 

He licked the bit of blood there. It was a mere trickle of stale-tasting liquid and _still_ it made his stomach tighten with need. He obviously had gone far too long this time. He would have to call up one of his regulars as soon as the shop closed. Thank god for the resurgence of interest in vampires. The past decade had been truly spectacular for his kind. Gone were the days of creeping around in back alleys, settling for anyone desperate enough to risk being bitten by a SUPERNATURAL in exchange for a twenty.

 

Nowadays, all Randall had to do was get on Craigslist, or one of the many SUPERNATURAL sights that had popped up in the last several years. NATnet was a boon to all things that went bump in the night. Randall didn’t even have to make his own posts anymore. There were always humans looking for a little blood sucking action, and Randall had managed to find a few favorites that he rotated through for his feedings.

 

He dusted the glass shelves behind the cash register and daydreamed about who he would call tonight. Someone plump and juicy. Callie, perhaps, with her blonde hair and pinchable love handles. Or maybe one of his big boys, Lawrence, with his soft beard and potbelly.

 

Randall accidentally bit his lip again and swore softly to himself. He glanced at the time on his phone. Two and a half hours until the shop closed. He groaned. He really should have eaten last night. Blood may not taste as divine when he stayed sated, but he had a business to run. He shouldn’t let himself get this desperate. It had been years since he’d forced himself on anyone, and he was trying really hard to keep up his new rules about consent. But damn… that woman over by the nipple clamps had such a lovely neck, and he could practically feel his teeth breaking through the surface tension of her skin, the hot rush in his mouth, his veins warming up, spreading liquid gold through his system…

 

The bell over the front door gave a little peal as a customer slipped inside. Randall didn’t even look up, still trying to keep his fangs hidden and not leap over the counter and tackle anyone to the linoleum. No more waiting this long between meals, dammit, it was nearly impossible-

 

Randall’s head swung toward the customer standing at the counter so fast his neck cracked. That scent. Holy _fuck._ This kid was a Spark, no fucking question. Randall’s fangs practically sprang out of his gums.

 

“Hey, man,” the Spark said, leaning his long body up against the glass counter. He looked at Randall through long lashes, his amber eyes bright but tired. “Can you help me find something? I’ve already tried two other places, and, well, one doesn’t even exist anymore, and the lady at the other place sniffed at me when I asked, soooo..” he shrugged and held up his (long, slender, white, beautiful, perfect) hands in defeat.

 

“Yeah,” Randall croaked, clearing his dry throat and willing his teeth into something more human. “Sure, what are you looking for?”

 

“Uh,” the Spark blushed. Oh god, he was a blusher. Randall watched the bright flush of blood in the boy’s cheeks and had to swallow the rush of saliva that flooded his mouth. Forget everyone else in the shop. Forget every contact in his little black book. Sparks were ambrosia to vampires. Still human, but with the flavor and feel of magic, like a sprinkle of smoky sugar to the palate. “A knotting dildo,” the boy continued, getting even pinker. It made his moles look like ink blotches. Randall had to will away a growing erection in addition to his watering mouth. _Fuck fuck fuck…_

 

“Oh, sure!” he managed to get out. _Don’t be creepy, don’t be creepy, don’t be…_ “Just follow me to the back and I’ll show you my special merchandise for NATs.” There, that wasn’t too bad. “I keep it in a separate room, ‘cause, even though we’ve made great strides forward in the last few decades, it can still freak out the humans to have a three-foot wyvern dick staring them in the face.” Hmm, less okay, but still not the worst thing he’d ever said to a customer.

 

He glanced back as they made their way through the beaded curtain, the strands clacking loudly as they swung back into place behind them. The Spark looked a bit shell-shocked. _God dammit,_ Randall berated himself. _Why are you like this?_

 

“Sorry, man,” Randall apologized. He found himself doing that a lot, especially now that he was around humans so often. “I, uh, didn’t mean to-’

 

“No, no,” the Spark said, swallowing hard. “Th-three f-feet?””

 

_Oh._

 

Randall felt a predatory smile slip over his face. “Yes,” he purred, motioning the man over to his side with the stereotypical vampire “come hither” gesture, his fingers curling up in a graceful arc. He nearly moaned when the Spark stepped immediately into his space.

 

Randall turned his attention to the large packaging in front of them. The wyvern dildos were displayed in their own section, some in boxes, some strapped to sturdy cardboard backers. The jewel of the collection, a jet-black beauty stretching over four feet in length with Celtic knot designs along the base, wasn’t in any packaging at all, but was displayed on clear plastic rests.

 

The boy’s jaw had dropped open, his amber eyes glazing over. Randall let the boy stare without interrupting for several minutes, not wanting to draw attention to how how close he’d crept, his nose inches from the Spark’s ear. He breathed in. Randall felt drunk. He started leaning in, closer, closer, the pulse under the man’s skin drawing him like a moth to a flame.

 

“People _use_ these?” the Spark asked in awe, and Randall headed himself off just in time. He moved back and cleared his throat.

 

“Well, not humans, typically,” he explained, trying to concentrate on anything besides the boy’s scent. It was coating his tongue like honey. “I have a few human collectors that get them for display, but the only people who buy them for use are wyverns, or wyvern-compatible NATs.”

 

They both stood admiring the phalisis for a few more moments, before Randall steered them over to the werewolf section. After the immensity of the wyvern dildos, the werewolf ones almost looked small, though they dwarfed the human versions in the main room.

 

“I have several recommendations for these,” Randall said, hoping he was coming off as a competent salesman, and not a colossal creeper. “Can I ask if it is going to be used for a human or a werewolf? And whether it will be inserted anally?”

 

The Spark shuffled his feet and Randall’s suspicions were confirmed. This was not a purchase for a friend or as a joke, like some of his human clients claimed. This was for his own use. His mouth started to water and his cock filled with what blood he had left in his veins. He shifted slightly behind the boy to hide his situation, reaching around the warm, lean body to grab one of the boxes off the shelf.

 

“A personal favorite,” Randall hushed in the man’s ear, watching with satisfaction when a shiver ran through the man’s body. He stared at the goosebumps forming on the Spark’s neck in fascination. If this went well, maybe Randall could offer to give him a personal demonstration of the dildo. It was thick and slightly soft. It would look gorgeous splitting the Spark open, while Randall pumped it in and out of him, both keeling in his silk-lined coffin, Randall behind him, grasping his throat gently, pulling him slowly back to his chest, his mouth descending, his teeth piercing, deeper and deeper…

 

The Spark gasped and Randall straightened up, mortified. _Oh shit,_ he had been projecting that last bit. The Spark had probably just seen his fantasy like he was watching a VR porno.

 

The boy grabbed the dildo out of Randall’s hands. “Yes, good, fine. I’ll take this one,” he said in a rush, and made for the beaded curtain like the hounds of hell were after him. Randall sighed. Telepathy was not the amazing power a lot of humans assumed it was. Most of the time is was a damn nuisance.

 

Randall rang up the dildo, adding his business card to the bag with a quick note: _If you have any questions on how to use this, call me. - Randy_

 

He figured the Spark wouldn’t but, hell, the kid was into werewolves, right? There was a small chance he’d give vampires a try, maybe.

 

Randall watched the Spark leave, the bell ringing merrily as the hottest thing to ever walk into his shop got away. He lasted a full five minutes before herding the last remaining customer out of the door and closed up early.

 

Grasping the base of his cock to keep from losing it, Randall thumbed through his contacts. Hitting the call button, he held it up to his ear hopefully.

 

“Hi, Cassie,” Randall breathed out in relief. “Say, sweetie, how would you feel about doing a threesome feeding with Lawrence tonight?”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Required listening:  
> How Randall views himself: [Teeth](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h6S_9O24ods)  
> How Stiles views Randall: [Go Getter Greg](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AeZEjU0nZeo)


End file.
